Running hot and cold (and hot again) travel blog






Cocks in frocks

Rita and ted

It seems that Roly the bus driver hasn't done this journey before and Rita is meant to be the navigator. She's not very good at it. Heaps and heaps of time has seen us do a three point turn in the middle of an intersection, reverse up a highway, go around a roundabout a couple of times etc. He had a curious driving style. It is very fast, stop very quickly and turn abruptly left or right. Including prevaricating about which you are going to do. It's has included all of the styles together in curious combinations. We have almost been fish tailing up the highway as he can't choose a lane. He doesn't brake until we are almost in the back seat of the car in front. It must be disconcerting to see us lurching up the road, speed backwards along a road, and do these weird turns. I think it's a combination of his style and Rita having no idea where we are. We have also done touch parking - he backed into a light pole which scared me as I'm up the back. The roads in Poland are mostly concrete and we have been bedoomp a doomping up the highway for what seems hours. At the lunch stop Alan and I saw a small creature yet to be identified. We can't agree on what it looked like but it sort of looks like this... A rat sized body with sleek light brown fur, but with a white stripe down the side or a white belly. We aren't sure. A squirrely typed face but smaller. I thought it had a ratty tail. Alan thought it had a flat tail. It moved bloody fast. At the lunch stop I tried the national dish. Epic fail. It was potato dumplings.. Rita said looks terrible will be delicious. I had a small bowl. The dumplings looked like boiled baby spuds. Inside was sort of mince meat. It has a white cabbage sauce tasting vaguely of mustard. Looks terrible tastes ok but I don't need to have it again. Texture 0/10,taste 0/10. Followed by a beautiful looking tiramisu homemade in a cup thing. Dry at the top, soggy at the bottom, and full of whipped cream, not Mascarpone cheese. Another epic fail. At least the coffee was good.

A long drive, unremarkable scenery, broken only by the unorthodox stops we have to make because Roly's machine says we have to and the jiggling of my boobs on these concrete roads. I can't work out how Kevin does it but he just sleeps and sleeps. For hours and hours.

We passed town after town of polish people going about their ordinary days. It's very comforting to see that people everywhere really are just the same. Working to improve the town they live in, give their families a safe home and life. But my goodness, some of these people live in butt ugly houses.

Half of the people on tour are sick... Coughing up their spleens with disgusting gurgle phlegm, blowing noses, sneezing, coughing such piercing coughs as to make your ear drums bleed. I'm ready to kick them all off.

We eventually got here, and as Cesky Krumlov is a unesco town no buses from outside can come in. So we had to ditch the bus and load our things into a mini bus and walk. It sounded like we had to walk a long way... But it took maybe 5 minutes if I'm generous. We are staying in a medieval building. An old inn. The rooms are fabulous. Well mine is anyway. The boys had to move. They had a bathroom built by a doofus. There is plenty of room in there and I'm not sure why it is like it is, but the shower/bath has been put under the sloped roof so you can't stand up in the shower. At the other end of the bath you potentially could stand up if you had scoliosis and didn't mind the long metal spike attached to the skylight piercing your eye, ear or brain. We couldn't believe it, and you won't either so I'm uploading the photos. They moved.

We went for a reccy around the old town before dinner and soon we were sharing an ale at the pub next door to our hotel. Rita came and got us and took us up to get into our medieval clothes. Yes, we have photos of this as well. We had a great night, the two Lynne's didn't come though. The boys had venison... I had duck... C'est magnifique! It was absolutely beautiful. A great time was had by all until the bill came. There was a complimentary drink however we all had large not small so had to pay. Ted paid for everyone after saying... We all owe him now... The bill came to about 12.50 Australian. He spent the whole night bagging Bunnik tours and talking about things Rita had told him but probably wished she hadn't. He will get her the sack if he doesn't shut up. I have photos if them as well. She's very pretty when she smiles. A great day. Tiring but good.

Entry Rating:     Why ratings?
Please Rate:  
Thank you for voting!
Share |